Will I find someone for me in 2010?!

For many, the holidays are a time to hang out with friends and family and look back on the year past and ponder what lies ahead. Relationships always tend to dominate the conversation among many, both young and old. I've always found the topics, opinions and perspectives interesting. So I said one day. I'm going to start a blog to see what others think about this complex thing called relationships.

Although I'm not a professional writer and choose not to be, 2010 is the year to try and get to the root of the what men and women really think. It will be fun and the topics are endless for sure.

Once the drinks start flowing and folks loosen up a bit, the true feelings really start to come out. I think the best is when you have both men and women, from all walks of life, financial situations and current relationship status. Some are looking for love and some want out their current relationship.

One recent conversation centered around how much effort do you put in during the early stages after meeting someone. I've always thought that women controlled the flow of relationships, but it's just a matter of whether they choose to keep it that way. The struggle for control is present in many walks of life, relationships are no exception. I have always said that men will do what women allow them to do, in terms of behavior within a relationship. Men know this! Some women "allow" more than others.

The tone of relationships are set early on and is one of the most critical points of development. At the end of the day, we all are going to do what we want to do. But in my opinion, expectations need to be made clear. Early on you may not know what you want, but you need to say that. Silence can be disaster. Clarity is key. You cannot control what he or she does, but you can control what you do. We all tend to gravitate to the best situation for us at the time. Whatever that is. It's just human nature. My thought has always been, live your life and it will work itself out in terms of your relationships. However, it all boils down to choices.

Men and women can find happiness, but the journey can definitely be a struggle. So when you look at effort and control, it becomes less inportant if you keep it in perspective and realize the dynamics of the process. Of course I am speaking from a male perspective, but I think the point in universal.

People and things are never as great as they may seem or as bad as they may seem. Most of us are on our best behavior and are out to put that best foot forward; at least the person we think the other person wants to see. I'll expand on these topics a little later, but i just wanted to put a few thoughts out there.

Drop me a note and let me know what you think. What has your experiences been like and what do you think your fellow men and women should do as we move into 2010? I catch you later!